This Bittersweet Post Why It’s So Hard For Moms To Live In The Moment Is Spot On

April 10, 2018
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As Mom’s and Dads, we’re constantly caught in between longing for days gone by and anticipation for the future. 

We become nostalgic about the smell of a baby’s head, we can’t wait for the next milestone — the list goes on. 

One Mother has perfectly summed up the bittersweet feelings that encompass motherhood, and how it’s so hard to live in the moment — but why it’s important that we do.

Casey Huff, Mother and writer behind Etched In Home, shared her conflicting feelings in a heartfelt post written — when else — while reflecting on things in the middle of the night, after her child had woken up.

“It’s 11:57 p.m. My head hits the pillow and your cries hit the monitor. It’s a different night, but the same old song and dance.”“I both long for the nights when the whole of your body fit cradled in just one of my arms, and look forward to the nights when you will sleep all the way through, giving me permission to take my own sleep in one big, dreamy lump sum,” she writes.

She goes on about how much she misses the days of tiny onesies pureed foods, but can’t wait to run outside and enjoy things like family movie nights. Because as Mothers, we’ve always got one foot in the past — where we miss those sweet babies of ours who spent hours in our arms. 

At the same time, we’ve also got our eyes to the future — anticipating more restful nights and the next milestone that turns our babies into independent individuals.

“I long for the cling of your newborn fingers, yet I look forward to the days when you don’t need me quite so much for every little thing,” she writes. “This motherhood thing; it’s a complicated web of longing for the past, living in the present, and praying for the future. And if I’m being honest, sometimes I can’t seem to balance the three.”

Spot on!

It’s just so hard to press pause sometimes and just “live in the moment.” And Huff gets it right.

“In my reminiscing for what was, and anticipation of what will be, I forget to recognize the now; overshooting it by the five minutes that it’ll take to finish ‘this’ task, or the two weeks that it’ll take for you to get through ‘that’ difficult phase. I don’t want to lose this moment.”

Huff’s post is a gentle, important reminder that we also need to take time to breathe and be present. We need to this for both for ourselves and our kids.

“Everyone is always telling parents to ‘enjoy every moment’ without acknowledging what a challenge that can be,” Huff tells Scary Mommy. She says she wanted to share the post because motherhood is complicated, and “tugs at every heartstring.”

In her post, she acknowledeges that while she didn’t want to get out of bed to answer the midnight wakeup call, she did — because of course she did. That’s just what we do. Sometimes, there’s magic in those moments alone.

“So yes, my heart is probably always going to long, and my mind is always going to look forward, but I’m also going to give it my all to not overlook these moments we’re living. And tonight, I think I’ll stay here with you for just a while longer.”

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